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Where you end and I begin : a memoir  Cover Image Book Book

Where you end and I begin : a memoir / Leah McLaren.

McLaren, Leah, (author.).

Summary:

"A daughter's riveting, devastating portrait of her relationship with her mother, a brilliant and charismatic woman haunted by childhood sexual trauma. When an eight-year-old Leah McLaren's parents get divorced, her mother, Cessie, flees her conventional life as a suburban housewife in search of a glamorous journalism career. In the chaotic years that follow, with her daughter in tow, Cessie lurches from one apartment, job and toxic romance to the next. Their bond is loving but also marked by casual indifference. Cessie's self-described parenting style of "benign neglect" is a hilarious party joke and Leah's stark reality. Their family motto, "Commitment sucks the life right out of you" is tacked up on every rental fridge. Inside the shelves are empty. During Leah's first year of high school she becomes gripped with anxiety following a troubling early sexual experience at a party. Cessie, in turn, makes a disclosure that will alter everything: from the age of twelve to fifteen, she was in a clandestine relationship with her middle-aged, married riding instructor. The damage inflicted by the "Horseman," Cessie explains, is the reason for all her ill-conceived life choices, including marriage, divorce and even motherhood itself. Both women will spend decades haunted by the specter of the Horseman, until they decide to investigate what became of him--an ill-conceived quest that will test the bonds of love and redefine their relationship forever. Written with searing candour and merciless wit, Where You End and I Begin is an intimate exploration of the ways intergenerational trauma is shared between women, and how acts of harm can be confused with acts of love"-- Provided by publisher.

Record details

  • ISBN: 9780735281004 (hardcover)
  • Physical Description: 240 pages ; 24 cm
  • Publisher: Toronto : Random House Canada, 2022.
Subject: McLaren, Leah > Childhood and youth.
McLaren, Leah > Family.
Adult children of divorced parents > Canada > Biography.
Children of divorced parents > Family relationships.
Children of divorced parents > Canada > Biography.
Children of rape victims > Canada > Biography.
Mothers and daughters > Canada > Biography.
Authors, Canadian (English) > Biography.
Genre: Biographies.
Autobiographies.

Available copies

  • 1 of 1 copy available at Tsuga Consortium.

Holds

  • 0 current holds with 1 total copy.
Show Only Available Copies
Location Call Number / Copy Notes Barcode Shelving Location Status Due Date
Lakeshore Branch 819.8603 McLar 31681010286920 NONFIC Available -

  • Random House, Inc.
    NATIONAL BESTSELLER

    A daughter’s unflinching exploration of the intimate and unconventional relationship she shared with her mother—a brilliant, charismatic woman haunted by a traumatic past.


    When Leah is eight, her mother, Cessie, abruptly flees her role as a rural housewife in search of a glamorous career in the city. In the chaotic years that follow, Cessie lurches from one apartment, job, and toxic romance to the next. In a home without rules or emotional boundaries, daughter and mother become close confidantes—a state of enmeshment that suits them both. Their bond is loving but also marked by casual indifference. Cessie’s self-described parenting style of “benign neglect” is a hilarious party joke, but for her daughter it’s reality. In Leah’s first year of high school, her mother makes a disclosure that will forever alter their relationship: She confides that from the age of 12 well into her teens, she was the lover of her 45-year-old married pony club instructor. The trauma of the “Horseman,” Cessie explains, is not just a dark family secret but the reason for all her ill-conceived life choices, including marriage and motherhood itself. For years after, into adulthood, Leah is haunted by the specter of the Horseman. He is the nameless anxiety and restlessness she observes in her mother and increasingly recognizes in herself. Eventually, she and Cessie set out to discover truth of what became of her mother’s rapist. The investigation that ensues pushes their relationship to the brink of collapse. Leah is seeking solace in the facts, but first she must confront a deeper, more painful truth: that her story—the story of trying and failing to love a complicated mother—is not the Horseman’s after all. A riveting and devastating portrait of mother and daughter, Where You End and I Begin is a memoir that explores how trauma is shared between women and how acts of harm can be confused with acts of love.

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