Book
Us : getting past you & me to build a more loving relationship / Terrence Real ; foreword by Bruce Springsteen.
"You've probably heard some variation of the idea that before you can love someone else, you first have to learn to love yourself. Renowned family therapist and marriage counselor and bestselling author Terrence Real says that we've got it all wrong. In fact, the way to save your relationship is not by working on yourself, but instead by working together. Continuing to focus on yourself will just feed the problem, which is that most of us developed a set of techniques to survive our families that no longer serve us as adults. You can learn to tap into your wiser, more collaborative self. In this groundbreaking book, Real offers a new set of science-backed relational skills that have saved real marriages on the brink. Using psychology, history, and stories of actual couples who have entered his office, Real helps readers move beyond their traumas and stressors and shift from thinking in terms of me and you to a different consciousness. The consciousness of us. The Hail Mary family therapist for couples on the verge of divorce, Real teaches us how to speak up for ourselves with love and build solid, loving relationships that are authentic and interdependent"-- Provided by publisher.
Record details
- ISBN: 9780593233672 (hardcover)
- Physical Description: xi, 338 pages ; 22 cm
- Edition: First edition.
- Publisher: New York, NY : Goop Press/Rodale, [2022]
- Copyright: ©2022
Content descriptions
| Bibliography, etc. Note: | Includes bibliographical references and index. |
| Formatted Contents Note: | Which version of you shows up to your relationship? -- The myth of the individual -- How us gets lost and you and me takes over -- The individualist at home -- Start thinking like a team -- You cannot love from above or below -- Your fantasies have shattered, your real relationship can begin -- Fierce intimacy, soft power -- Leaving our kids a better future -- Becoming whole -- Epilogue: Broken light. |
Search for related items by subject
| Subject: | Couples > Psychology. Interpersonal conflict. Interpersonal relations. Man-woman relationships. Married people > Psychology. |
Available copies
- 1 of 1 copy available at Tsuga Consortium.
Holds
- 0 current holds with 1 total copy.
Show Only Available Copies
| Location | Call Number / Copy Notes | Barcode | Shelving Location | Status | Due Date |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Cookstown Branch | 306.7 Rea | 31681010285252 | NONFIC | Available | - |
- Baker & Taylor
In this groundbreaking book, a renowned family therapist and marriage counselor, using psychology, history and stories from actual couples heâs counseled, offers a new set of science-backed relational skills shifting the focus of âme and youâ to âus.â - Baker & Taylor
"You've probably heard some variation of the idea that before you can love someone else, you first have to learn to love yourself. Renowned family therapist and marriage counselor and bestselling author Terrence Real says that we've got it all wrong. In fact, the way to save your relationship is not by working on yourself, but instead by working together. Continuing to focus on yourself will just feed the problem, which is that most of us developed a set of techniques to survive our families that no longer serve us as adults. You can learn to tap into your wiser, more collaborative self. In this groundbreaking book, Real offers a new set of science-backed relational skills that have saved real marriages on the brink. Using psychology, history, and stories of actual couples who have entered his office, Real helps readers move beyond their traumas and stressors and shift from thinking in terms of me and you to a different consciousness. The consciousness of us. The Hail Mary family therapist for couples onthe verge of divorce, Real teaches us how to speak up for ourselves with love and build solid, loving relationships that are authentic and interdependent"-- - Random House, Inc.
NEW YORK TIMES, WALL STREET JOURNAL, AND USA TODAY BESTSELLER ⢠Stop working on yourself as an individual and start working on your relationship as a couple, with the help of the renowned family therapist and author of The New Rules of Marriage
âThis book is a road map for all of us who seek true intimacy.ââGWYNETH PALTROW, founder and CEO of goop
ONE OF THE BEST BOOKS OF THE YEAR: The Wall Street Journal
Not much is harder than figuring out how to love your partner in all their messy humannessâand thereâs also not much thatâs more important.
At a time when toxic individualism is rending our society at every level, bestselling author and renowned marriage counselor Terrence Real sees how it poisons intimate relationships in his therapy practice, where he works with couples on the brink of disaster. The good news: Warmer, closer, more passionate relationships are possible if you have the right tools.
In his transformative book Us, Real brilliantly observes how our winner-takes-all culture infiltrates families with devastating results: repetitive fights that go nowhere, or a distant relationship in which partners end up living âalone together.â With deft insight, humor, and charm, Real guides you to transform your relationship into one thatâs based on compassion, collaboration, and closeness.
Us is a groundbreaking guide to a new science-backed skillsetâone that will allow you to get past your knee-jerk reactions and tap into your wiser, more collaborative self. With a novelistâs flair, Real shares the stories of couples whose relationships have been saved by these skills and pans out to the culture that reinforces our dysfunction. If you and your partner are backed into separate corners of âyouâ and âme,â this book will show the way back to âus.â With Us, your true relationship can begin.
