"Sensitively wrought and gorgeously written." —Courtney Summers, New York Times bestselling author of Sadie and I’m the Girl

From the award-winning author of We Deserve Monuments comes a searing, emotionally charged novel about a girl desperate to belong, a spiral into alcohol-fueled chaos, and the raw, unflinching path to finding herself.

A Kirkus Reviews Best Book of the Year
A School Library Journal Best Book of the Year
A Chicago Public Library Best Book of the Year

It’s the summer before college and Blake Brenner and her girlfriend, Ella, have one goal: join the mysterious and exclusive Serena Society. The sorority promises status and lifelong connections to a network of powerful, trailblazing women of color. Ella’s acceptance is a sure thing—she’s the daughter of a Serena alum. Blake, however, has a lot more to prove.

As a former loner from a working-class background, Blake lacks Ella’s pedigree and confidence. Luckily, she finds courage at the bottom of a liquor bottle. When she drinks, she’s bold, funny, and unstoppable—and the Serenas love it. But as pledging intensifies, so does Blake’s drinking, until it’s seeping into every corner of her life. Ella assures Blake that she’s fine; partying hard is what it takes to make the cut . . .

But success has never felt so much like drowning. With her future hanging in the balance and her past dragging her down, Blake must decide how far she’s willing to go to achieve her glittering dreams of success—and how much of herself she’s willing to lose in the process.

A powerful exploration of the lengths we go to feel seen, and the devastating consequences of an unquenchable thirst. Perfect for fans of Kathleen Glasgow's The Glass Girl and Helena Fox's How It Feels to Float.